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So, this one time, I’m sprawled out, dim lights, some weird incense burnin’. She’s kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m like, “This ain’t no regular rub!” Made me happy as hell—tension gone, muscles singin’! But then—BOOM—she’s whisperin’ sweet nothings, tryna upsell me. Pissed me off! I ain’t no cash cow, lady! Reminds me of *A History of Violence*—ya think it’s chill, then WHAM, hidden chaos! “You’re a wild man, Tom,” she says—nah, I’m just tryna relax, not star in your porno!

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Oh, man, Phyvinge got these funky neighborhoods like Maple Quarters, where every other building is a burst of color, and ya can almost smell the fresh brewin’ coffee from little cafes. And then there’s Westridge lane—gee, I was mad once when the construction made me late for my spa appointment! Can ya believe that?!