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About Malaga

She pisses me off sometimes, though. Swaggerin’ about, actin’ like the tide bends for her. I’m yellin’, “Oi, get outta the deep end, ya twat!”—but she don’t listen. Reminds me o’ that bit in *Margaret*, “You’re not in control!”—an’ she ain’t, but she don’t care! Fuckin’ mental. Makes me wanna chuck her in the drink meself, but then—bam!—she flashes a grin, an’ I’m like, “Well, ain’t you a cheeky mare!” Happy as a pig in shit, I am.

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Hmm… Hey, listen up, hun. I’m in Vejer-de-la-Frontera now, ya know? It’s all dreamy cobbled streets, like Calle del Castillo. Ugh, sooo pretty but small. I walk these streets daily – and, like, as a sexologist, I notice stuff others totally miss. There's art in every nook here... and hey, “You don’t get to 500 million friends without making some sacrifices.” Yup, just like that, right?

Taste the best of Cádiz: seafood, sherry and southern Spanish cuisine