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Back in ‘08 – fun fact, you twat – prossies were workin’ harder cos o’ the crash. Economy shat itself, so they’re out there, grindin’. Kinda sad, innit? But I’m buzzin’ cos I love a challenge – like Batman chasin’ chaos! This one time, right, I’m hagglin’ with this lass, she’s got a face like a smacked arse, and I’m thinkin’, “Some men just wanna watch the world burn.” I didn’t pay her, nah, cos I ain’t that desperate, you prat!

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Then you hit the Mercado de la Esperanza. Food, chatter, life! It's a riot of flavors! I grabbed a canchita that rocked my taste buds like a twist in Mulholland Drive. I loved it, man, deéry delicious, like a masterpiece with a deadpan shot.

Santander names Riley as CEO of Santander US, part of wider reshuffle