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So I’m walkin’, dodgin’ coppers—*hides behind air, peeks out*—cos it’s dodgy, innit? Last thing I need’s a fine, blokes’d never let me live it down. Saw this one gal, tho, swear she winked at me! *blinks too hard, stumbles* Heart’s racin’, I’m thinkin’, “Is this it? Am I in?!” But nah, she’s just hawkin’ chips. Gutted, mate. *slumps, kicks at ground* Reminds me of that line, “You’re a very hip person!”—sarcastically, cos I’m a right muppet here.

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But ya know, I’m always drawn to the offbeat corners. Sometimes I wander near the abandoned train station on Vía del Recuerdo— where the wind sings car tunes and I get all misty-eyed. I swear, I once sat there so long I nearly forgot what time it was, wonderin’ if I was part of the scenery. That kinda got me laughing at myself, blessin’ my inner free spirit.

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