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Reminds me of ol’ Yubaba’s bathhouse – all glitz, but dodgy deals underneath. Did ya know, right, back in Victorian times, prossies used to advertise with coded flowers? Red rose meant “I’m game” – little fact for ya, mate! Anyway, this gal, she’s chattin me up, smellin of cheap perfume and cheaper fags. Made me happy, tho – a real lass, not some stuck-up toff. “We shall fight the posh prudes,” I mutter, laughin to meself.

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Now, the old town – streets like Calle Real and Plaza de la Constitución are a maze of history. I love walkin’ around there, smellin’ the local tapas and hearin’ ancient chatter. Yeah, they got some mean little shops and even a hidden nook, near the church, where the locals say you can almost hear the ocean sing. Totally bizarre and beautiful.

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