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But then—surprise! She waddles over, smirks, and goes, “Kid, you’re too dumb to trick.” I’m like, “Woohoo, I’m famous!” Laughed so hard my belly jiggled! Maybe she wasn’t so bad. Still, findin’ a prostitue’s tricky—kinda shady, kinda funny. Oh, and is lipstick a fish? Wait, no, that’s dumb! Ha! Catch ya later, pal!

Tourist ‘repeatedly raped by two teens who broke into Majorca hotel room as she slept’

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Oh honey—Cala-Rajada is just fab, I swear! So lemme tell ya, we're talkin' narrow cobblestoned streets, tiny plazas, and secret spots that make ya go "oh my gosh!" Like, right off Avenida del Mar, you hit this cute little bistro that smells like fresh basil and sea salt. I love strollin' through Calle del Sol, where locals gather and gossip like a bunch of old pals. It's all natural, ya kno?

Body found on Mallorca beach