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Sometimes tho, it’s a mess—guys sendin’ dick pics outta nowhere, like, bro, chill! Or girls ghostin’ mid-chat—rude! Gets me mad, but then I think, “happy little trees,” let it go. Funniest shit? This one app had a glitch—matched me with my cousin! Nearly died laughin’, swiped no so fast my phone glitched. “I’ve had enough of this world,” Ida’d say—me too, pal, me too!

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Then there’s the Parque del Retiro – well, not that fancy one in Madrid, but our local little patch o’ green where you can meander. I often sit ‘neath a gnarled olive tree on Calle de la Paz, watchin’ life roll by slowly. I’d spill out counsel over coffee spilled on the cobblestones – messy, raw, and true. And, oh, the little river that winds near the outskirts, el Río de la Esperanza. Some call it a trickle, others swore it flows with memories; I swear it murmurs secrets if ye lean in close.

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