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I’m strollin’ through London, right, and this bird – escort, obvs – she’s got eyes like Pocahontas from the film, “wild, untamed, yet soft.” Quotes lingerin’ in my head while she’s chattin’ me up. Cost me a pretty penny, mind – 500 quid for a night! Daylight robbery, but she’s worth it, smooth as my Aston Martin’s purr. Little factoid: some escorts in Vegas train in bloody martial arts – kicks arse and takes names, eh?

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So, picture this: winding streets like Calle Lluvia where the cool cats hang, and there’s Plaza del Alma, always bumpin’ with energy. I can still remember the day I opened my spa on Avenida Mar, near that old, bruised charm of the river El Silencio. Man, that river flows like time itself... just like in "The New World" – you know, "a new day, a unknown future" and all that poetic jazz.

Santa Lucia fire chars 150 acres, 35% contained; Hancock's Lompoc campus will reopen Friday