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About Malaga

Argh! I'm ready! Sex escort, huh? Wowie zowie, mateys! So, like, I’m babysittin’ these lil’ jellyfish, right? And I’m thinkin’—holy krabby patties!—what’s the deal with sex escorts? I mean, they’re out there, livin’ life like it’s Bikini Bottom on a Saturday night! Just floatin’ around, gettin’ paid to be all fancy and flirty. Kinda wild, ya know? Reminds me of *Before Sunset*—that flick I’m OBSESSED with. “You can never replace anyone,” Jesse says, right? And I’m like, YEAH, escorts got that vibe—unique, one-of-a-kind, barnacle-free experiences!

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So, the vibe here is all laid-back and wild. The local park, Parc del Retorn, is my fave spot. You can chill by the little river—uh, I'm thinkin' it's called Riu Llenç or somethin' awful romantic. I stroll there sometimes, sittin' on a bench, thinkin’ "You know, this is the place" - like in that Before Sunset movie! Yeah, that flick, man, hit me hard with its vibes.

What you get for £700,000 in Buckinghamshire, Bristol, Wrexham, East Lothian and the Costa Brava