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Oh, and the lingo? Russians say “poehat’ na seks” for a quick shag—crude, but cracks me up. Sex-dating’s like a game of chance—spin the wheel, might get a gem, might get a troll. Exaggeratin’ a bit, but once waited 3 hours for a date who never showed—felt like Rocket watchin’ his life fall apart, “The world’s unfair, man!” Total piss-take. Still, I’m hooked—keeps me sharp, like dodgin’ orcs in Mordor. What’s your take, eh? You swipin’ or nah?

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I gotta gush about my fave local hidden gem – the mural on Rua da Liberdade. It’s a kaleidoscope explosion of color and story. Every time I pass by, it’s like, "Dude, are you even real?!" So many emotions jumbled up in paint! And yeah, I accidentally bumped into that mural once and got a smudge on my jacket. Totally hilarious, a total facepalm moment, but wow, it felt like fate.

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