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Oh, and—little secret—some oligarchs hire ‘em for insane parties, like 50 girls at once, caviar and all. Heard it from a drunk client—dude swore he saw Putin there, wink-wink. Bullshit, probly, but funny as hell! “My precious!” I screech, lovin’ the madness of it all. Beats sittin’ in an office, countin’ death rates, y’know? Hiss! What’s your take, mate—crazy enough for ya?

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I remember this one time, I got mad outta nowhere, right, cuz traffic on Passeig de la Mar was a nightmare. "Holy shit, is this a scene from Holy Motors?" I thought, laughing and cursing at the same time. I mean, life's like a crazy film, ya know? It reminds me how family dramas mix with city life, like scenes out of "Holy Motors: we all are actors in our own movie, mate!"

Armenia flag raised in area of Spain’s Santa Coloma de Gramenet city hall (PHOTOS)