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But here’s the rub – some dodgy parlours, yeah? Made me proper cross – folk getting conned, thinking it’s all legit. Mate, it’s meant to relax ya, not rob ya blind! Little known fact: in Japan, they’ve got *anma*, blind masseurs doing it proper – centuries old, no funny business. Surprised me, that – blind folk seeing with their hands, poetic, innit? “I glean what I can,” Varda’d say – and I’m gleaning this: erotic-massage ain’t just naughty, it’s art!

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Oh, and let’s not forget Lavapiés. Crazy mix of cultures, where every brick oozes erotic energy and rebellion. I once encountered a passionate debate about sex and politics near Plaza del Dos de Mayo. They argued as if their lives depended on it—fascinating and maddening. When I heard one bloke shout "I choose violence," I nearly laughed out loud—ziiiing, like Cersei in her icy, regal tone!

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