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I’m lyin’ there, right, and she’s kneadin’ my back—oh em gee, heaven! But then, ugh, she hits a knot and I’m, like, screamin’ in my head, “This hurts so good!” Kinda mad tho, ‘cause I paid for relaxin’, not a wrestle sesh. Still, when she’s done, I’m glowin’—skin poppin’, stress gone. “My humanity’s been restored,” I whisper, straight-up quotin’ Solomon again, ‘cause, like, dramatic much?

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Thou must see the old bridge near Río Buelna – a waterway that churns like thine emotions. This old current carries tales of yore with every ripple; I was there at dawn, and oh boy, the light was like molten gold. Man, sometimes I get reely emo watchin’ the water dance.

Cantabria on high alert as wildfires destroy 2,000 hectares of land