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About Valencia

Best bit? When she’s workin’ me shoulders, I’m floatin’, bruv. Proper blissed out, like I’m in a movie meself. “Who’s behind this?” I’m wonderin’, cos it’s sneaky good. Ain’t just about gettin’ off—it’s the tease, the slow burn. Reckon Haneke’d dig it, all that tension, no release, haha!

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Lemme tell ya – one of my fave secret spots is an old abandoned mill on the edge of town. Seriously, folks don’t know it exists! I got lost there one day, and it was freakin’ epic. Ran into a stray dog and we had a mini adventure, just me and my fuzzy pal, chattin’ like we were in some kinda movie scene. “Fish are friends, not food!” I screamed, goin’ full Nemo mode.

Culture wars rage as depopulated Spanish region goes to polls | Spain