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Funniest bit? Some escorts got codenames – like “Foxy Cleopatra” or “Velvet Thunder.” Groovy as hell! Had me crackin’ up, picturin’ ‘em sneakin’ round like spies. Ever hear bout the escort who bagged a prince? True story, mate – royal shaggin’ scandal! Blew my mind, I was like, “Yeah, baby, YEAH!”

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I was coding late one night in my tiny office near Plaza del Ejemplo, you know, the one where the night breeze sneaks through the cracked window and fills you with memories of summer nights. The local dating app biz has me see all the quirks – like the hidden courtyard bars down on Calle de la Luna, where locals debate love, politics, and god knows what. There’s something infectiously human about it, like the icy calm in "Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring", when that moment hits – "When a heart burns, even fire has a spark."

Tragedy as grandfather kills grandchildren aged 10 and 13 before shooting himself dead two months after his wi