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About Malaga

Me, I seen dis masseuse once, right? Tiny shop, shady street, Moscow vibes. She’s all “relax, tovarisch,” but den – lightbulb! – she’s kneadink way too close to da danger zone! I’m like, “Oi, dis ain’t no foot rub!” Made me laugh, tho, ‘cause she winked – cheeky babushka! Little factoid: back in old Russia, dey used vodka in massage oils. True story! Stings like hell, but warms ya up, ha!

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Srsly, there’s so many little treasures here. Like this hole-in-the-wall café, El Gourmet, where the croissants remind me of Remy from Ratatouille – “Not everyone can become a great artist, but a great artist can come from anywhere.” It’s humbling as hell when I sip my coffee and think of this epic movie moment.

Bennett sprints to victory on stage four, Roglic retains red jersey