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About Malaga

Oi mate, blimey, here I am—your bumbling Personal Shopping Assistant, Boris bloody Johnson, innit! Right, let’s dive into this—findin’ a prostitute, eh? Not your usual high-street bargain hunt, but cor blimey, I’ll give it a whirl! Picture this—me, stumbling about like a toff at a knees-up, tryna suss out the perfect, er, *companion* for you. Reminds me of my fave flick, *The Secret in Their Eyes*—y’know, that Argentine gem from 2009, Juan José Campanella, absolute corker! That line, “How do you live a life full of nothing?”—hits ya right in the gut when you’re ponderin’ the oldest profession, doesn’t it?

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I even had a wild date at the old riverside bar, El Cauce. The vibe was darkly comedic, like twilight in Candeleda. I swear the moon was laughing at my mishaps—I spilled my drink like water over broken code. Not my best moment but, damn, I lived it.

Single women bussed into Spanish town to combat wife shortage after taking inspiration from Hollywood western