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Oh, and the smells—lavender my arse, more like cheap lube and desperation. Little quirk in me head: reckon the masseuse is judging yer hairy back, cackling inside. Mate, if you’re into sexual-massage, fair play—just don’t expect Oscar-worthy romance. It’s a transaction, not a bloody sonnet. “Truth’s a slippery fish,” says the film—same as that oily rub-down. Slapdash, messy, and a bit pathetic—perfectly human, eh? Now, where’s me tea?

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I’m not perfect with my words – sorry if my grammar is a bit busted (typo typos galore, right? like, 18+ errors, LOL). It’s just how I roll when I get excited about my city. So, if you’re comin’ by, grab a drink on the street outside the water park, wander around neighborhoods you’d normally skip, and let the magic of Camas hit ya. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll probably get confused, but hey, that's life in PCamas (es)! Enjoy the ride, my friend, and remember – goodbye to language, hello to life!

‘Our hearts are breaking’: Camas School District faces staff cuts, reductions amid multi-million dollar budget deficit