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Personal fave bit? When the masseuse finds that knot—you know, the one that’s been screamin since Monday. “The thing about pain,” like Solomon Northup said, “it demands to be felt.” And then—bam!—it’s gone, like a predator slinkin off into the bush. Makes me happy, that. Tho, once had a geezer go too hard—felt like he was tenderizin me for stew. Pissed me off, that did. “Oi, mate, I ain’t a slab of beef!” I yelled in me head—didn’t say it, tho, too British.

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So—listen up, alright? Almenara is a small town but it packs a punch. First, there's the famous Rua do Sol. I'm always hangin' around there, watching couples stroll hand in hand. There's also Avenida do Amor—yeah, that's right—where people say love is in the air like, literally. I once met this couple there, right? Their chemistry was off the charts, like nature alignin’ perfectly.

Unmasking José Riveiro’s right-hand man at Pirates