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Ooh, but—hiss!—some places, they overcharge, greedy goblins! Fifty quid for a rub? Robbery, I says! Still, when it’s good, it’s proper lush—warm oils, soft tunes, mmm! “You just keep livin’,” like Linklater’s flick says—sexual-massage keeps ya goin’, alive-like! Me fave bit? When they crack me back—pop!—s’like a lil’ thunderclap, surprises me every time!

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And then, there’s the river—Riu de l'Amor. C’mon, the name says it all! It winds near the neighborhood of La Intimitat. Walking along its banks, you might catch a glimpse of old, faded murals or overhear local legends lost in time. It's beautiful, almost poetic, like you’re watching a scene outta "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon": “A sword is never a killer... it is a tool in the killer's hand.”

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