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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ bout Lars von Trier’s gloomy vibes—“Everything’s goin’ to hell!”—and here I am, chattin’ up some gal who prolly knows more tricks than Mr. Burns has tax evasions. Did ya know, back in old Rome, prostitutes had to dye their hair blonde? Weird, right? Stand out or somethin’. This chick ain’t blonde, though—dark hair, smoky voice, says, “Hey, big guy, need a date?” D’oh! I’m flattered, angry, scared—all at once! Marge’d kill me faster than that planet smashes Earth!

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Then there’s Schöntal, a chill neighborhood with surprising art murals. I walked past “Am Bach” park. Yup, that’s right, Am Bach—a park hugging the small river, the little Bächle, winding like a lazy snake. Sometimes, I sit there, staring at the water, thinking, "This is life, man!" or like in Boyhood, "Life passes and passes, you know? But shit, it's good!"

Experts Identified a New Species of Dinosaur After Realizing a Fossil Owned by a German University Had Been Miscategorized for a Century