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About Dortmund

So, I’m cruisin’ the streets, lookin’ for some action, right? Westside vibes, dodgy corners, the lot. I see this bird, proper fit, standin’ under a flickerin’ lamp. I roll up, wind down the window, and I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She gives me this look, bruv, like I’m some mug. “Is it ‘cos I is black?” I shout, half-jokin’, half-pissed. She laughs, says, “Nah, mate, it’s ‘cos you look like a twat in that tracksuit!” Fair play, I rate that sass.

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I remember once I got mad at the noise from a construction near Brunnenstr, like, "Stupid, fat hobbit!" – I mean, seriously, can’t a guy enjoy some peace in his own city? But then I cooled off and actually admired the modern twist it brought. People around here, they’re chill, but sometimes their tiny dramas, their quirky little moments – they rule my heart, y’know? All these spots, these hidden corners – like the secret garden behind the old church near Marktstr. A lot of folks skip it, but me? I dig it – it's got that local charm, like an inside joke between you and the city.

Double tragedy as two missing British brothers, 9 and 7, found dead after drowning in lake