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About Essen

What pisses me off? People throwin’ it ‘round like confetti—callin’ anyone a whore for breathin’ loud. Chill, Karen, it ain’t that serious! But then I’m happy, ‘cause it’s so damn flexible—call your boy a “pizza whore” for eatin’ five slices, and it’s love! Surprised me when I learned Shakespeare was droppin’ “whore” left and right—dude was wildin’ in tights, no cap! “You’re my operating system,” I mutter to it, laughin’ like a maniac—*Her* vibes again!

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Oh, and don’t even get me started on the hidden gem cafes, like the one on "Bergstraße" (yup, that one)! They serve coffee that could make you feel like you’re in an art film montage. I once ordered a cappuccino there and felt like I was starring in "The Great Beauty" – “Luce che non si estingue mai!” Must be fate, right?

Damien Escobar