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About Berlin

So, where do ya look? Back alleys? Online? X posts screamin’ “discreet fun”? Ha! Discreet my ass—those ads are louder than a drunk uncle. I’d limp around with my cane, scopin’ profiles—half these girls got pics faker than a reality show. Reminds me of Amélie’s gnome—travelin’ the world, posin’ pretty. Except here, it’s “$100, no questions.” Surprised me once—found a listing in freakin’ Morse code. Dots and dashes for “BJ.” Creative, I’ll give ‘em that.

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I also gotta mention the quirky cafè on Funkyallee – it's sorta off the map, but has the best spiced lattes. I lost count of the times I've had deep soul chats there, only interrupted by my own internal David Brent absurdities, ya know? Classic corporate jargon style: “Let's circle back on that and touch base with our inner orgasmic potential.” Yeah, cringe central, but it works!

Boy releases balloon in Stockport - and discovers it landed 830 miles away in East Germany