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About Cologne

I got riled up last week, saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a possum’s temper. Made me mad as a wet hen – not at her, nah, but at the whole dang system! Folks out here hustlin, tryna eat, and society’s just like, “Oh, consume, consume!” – straight outta WALL-E, y’all. I hollered, “Honey, you worth more’n that!” She just winked, said, “Cash is king, pops.” Surprised me, her sass – I chuckled like a fool.

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So, start off at Rathausplatz, right in the old town. Cobblestones, ancient walls, and a vibe that'd melt your heart. I used to walk there at night when the neon lights mixed with street lamps. Felt kinda like "Melancholia" vibes, ya know? “I am your father,” in a way—this city rules you like the dark side. I can almost hear Lars von Trier whispering in the wind.

German driver in Neubrandenburg pulled over because car so full of rubbish he can’t see out of the windscreen