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About Dortmund

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—findin’ a prostitute. Makes my skin crawl, but here we go. Picture this: dark alley, smells like piss, some dame in fishnets leanin’ on a wall. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*—that scene where Aldo Raine says, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business.” Except here, it’s me, in the “avoidin’ hookers business.” Hate it. Hate the neon lights flashin’—red, blue, screamin’ sex for sale. Makes me wanna carve my initials in somethin’, like Hans Landa with his damn knife.

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Down by the river Lippe – yeah, don’t get it twisted, not a huge river but sure enough it winds its way through the town – that's where I go to clear my head after a wild rollercoaster session of counseling. I’ve seen raw, unfiltered emotions there – like a lifeblood for the urban eroticism. I sometimes wander around the adjacent park, Kleinwambach Park, where nature meets urban scandal. It's quiet, yet electrifying as if every butterfly flutters with secrets. Hahaha, wouldn’t you dig that?

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