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About Hamburg

I’m pissed, tho—why’s it so tricky? Small town blues, man! Web’s all “search X, browse sites,” but I’m scared Marge’d catch me. “Homer, you pig!” she’d scream. Happy tho—imaginin’ it’s like *Great Beauty*, all glamorous, not sleazy. “Life’s a parade,” Jep says—I’d strut, fat gut and all, lookin’ for my Roman fling! D’oh! Prolly trip over Apu’s trash first.

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Neighborhoods? Oh man, the Heimfeld area’s a quirky blend of modern chic and old world charm. You can see hip cafés, tiny bars and art spots that have some underground soul. I mean, sometimes I’m so in love with the city's vibes I can’t help but shout, “I am burdened with glorious purpose!” while massaging away the stress of the day—just lettin’ that mischief sparkle out.

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