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About Dusseldorf

So, I dig a little—did ya know in Amsterdam they got these window girls? Red lights, boom, they’re just standin’ there, posin’. Fact: been legal since, what, 2000? Crazy! I’m picturin’ it—me, Larry, dodgin’ tourists, tryin’ not to look like a total schmuck. “Oh, just admirin’ the architecture!” Yeah, right. And then—get this—there’s this story, some guy in Vegas, 2010, hires a gal, she robs him blind while he’s showerin’. Left with his socks and a hangover! I’d be screamin’, “Are you kiddin’ me?!” Infuriating, man, just infuriating.

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Oh, and don’t even get me started on local food joints—Pan's Diner on Ebbenstrasse serves comfort food that makes ya feel as warm as a hug from Mama. I always say, "This meal's as magic as a bath in spirit water!" even if I'm prone to droppin’ my fork, bless my scatterbrain.