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About Essen

So, check this—ya gotta know the streets, man! Downtown, late night, neon lights buzzin—prime spot! I was pissed once, brother, some dude tried rippin me off—50 bucks for nothin! “What am I doing here?”—straight outta *Brooklyn*, that hit me hard. Felt like a chump, but I flexed, scared him off—Hogan style! Ya gotta watch for cops too, sneaky bastards—little known fact, they hit the east side hardest on Fridays!

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So, first off, lemme take ya on a stroll down Schillerstraße. Bam! You're smack in the middle of all that hustle and bust-lust ager, well, in our own haibachian way, right? There's that cheeky little park, Brontosaurus Park – no, not real dinosaurs, but it’s got these statues that remindcha of them, and truth is, they freak me out sometimes (yeah, gettin' all psycho here, but hey, that's me!). Though sometimes I get mad wanderin' there – folks rush past without seein' the beauty. But whatevs, it's a vibe.

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