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About Dortmund

I saunter up, all cocky, say, “Hey, how’s biz?” She laughs—dry, sarcastic laugh—goes, “Better than your fish stink.” Burn! I’m mad for a sec, but damn, she’s funny! Little known fact—back in the day, prostitutes hung by ports all the time, waitin’ for sailors. History’s wild, right? Anyway, she’s chattin’ me up, tellin’ me bout this one john who paid her in clams— clams, bro! I’m dyin’ laughin’, picturin’ her stuffin’ shells in her purse.

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Stumblin' into the city center, you'll hit Hauptstrasse real quick – it's our main drag, full of cool cafes and dating app users swiping away their lonely nights. Seriously, it's a goldmine for my work, and trust me, I've seen some wild profiles. Near Hauptstrasse, there's a quirky little park called Scherzpark. Yeah, that spot is small but packs a punch – like that one scene in "Melancholia" where time just slows down and you realize shit’s real.

Scott Hagenbach, Joe Shaver attending Summit Circle conference