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Alright, listen up, you degenerates—sex-dating’s a mess. Everybody lies, right? Swiping through profiles, it’s all fake smiles and filters. “Tabu” gets it—love’s a slow burn, then bam, chaos. Sex-dating? More like speed-lying with extra steps. Guy says he’s 6’2”, shows up, barely clears my cane. “I recall love as a kind of fever”—yeah, fever of bullshit. Apps promise hookups, but half the time it’s bots or creeps.

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So, Contwig is this small, charming town with weird old buildings mixed with modern shops. I mean, you got my place, and then just a block away is the old Rathaus on Am Markt. Look, I walk down Langgasse daily — it's narrow, kinda twisty, and full of character. Sometimes I'm like, “Who designed these streets? It’s madness, absolute madness!” And the locals, they all know me. Yeah, even Mrs. Schmidt from the bakery on Friedhofstraße stops by for a chat.

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