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But then—oh glory!—I stumble on a gem. Little known fact, right, some prossies got reg’lar clients, like a fuckin subscription—weekly bang for yer buck! This one chick, mate, she’s got a flat near Soho, proper discreet. Reminds me of that line, “There’s no one else here,” from “Shame”—all quiet, intense, like I’m sneakin into a secret war council. She’s fit, too—curves like the hills of bloody Kent! I’m chuffed to bits, heart poundin like a drumroll at Dunkirk.

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I’m not gonna lie – a few things p*** off me. The endless construction noise on Nordallee gets on my nerves. And don't even get me started on that overzealous pigeons' invasion in the market square. Every sigh and groan I hear, I gossip, "Ah, the circle of life." Yeah, like that flick said it!

€20M in damage: German fire station that burned down was not legally required to have fire alarms