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Anyways, I’s thinkin’, why’s it so bloody hard? Them girls, they’s everywhere, but not when ya need ‘em! Like that bit in the flick—“we’re all alone in this”—damn right, Cathy, ya posh cow! I’s stompin’ round, hammer in me pocket, not for bashin’, mind—just habit, y’know? This one lass, she pops out, all “Hiya, love!”—nearly shat meself, surprised me good! Skinny as a rail, eyes like a dead fish, but she’s got sass. We likes sass, don’t we, precious?

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Trust me, my friend, this place is chaotic, addictive, utterly charming. You might even hear echoes of fate, like some secret spy message from “The Lives of Others,” sayin’: "Who watches the watchers?" And I laugh ‘cause, really, it suits our cheeky town perfectly.

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