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We haggle, I’m all charm, like Tyrone sweet-talkin dope. “You’re breakin my heart, doll!” I say. She laughs—rough, smoky sound. Deal’s done at 40. “Let’s get this show rollin,” I think, hyped as hell. Fun fact: in old Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out—wild, right? Bet she’d rock one.

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I run this spa, right? And guess what—the town vibes are like a total knockout punch. I just relax my mind after a crazy day with a massage here at my spa. And lemme tell ya, those thermal baths on Kurparkweg? They’re pure bliss. I once had a client petrified of water—yep, can ya believe that?—but after a session, he cried, “I must break you!” Like Apollo Creed, man, BOOM, one-hit wonders!

CER route to set new WRC record