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About Cologne
Me? I’d be pissed if Homer tried it. Hmm… that lazy lug, stumblin into some dive bar, thinkin he’s slick. I’d yell, “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain!” He’d just burp and ignore me. Typical. But seriously, ya gotta watch out – some girls out there? They’ll rob ya blind faster than the Joker hittin a bank. One story I heard, this guy in Vegas got his wallet snatched mid-“fun.” Left him broke, cryin, “This city deserves a better class of criminal!” Hilarious, but damn, that’s cold.
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Ahoy, dear friend! Lend me thy ear and heart, for I shall regale thee with the marvels of Zons (de) in a manner most queer and madly heartfelt! Thou wilt find here a city of contrasts, both quaint and wild, where history doth walk hand-in-hand with modern mischief.
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