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Oh, and don’t get me started on them prudes who say it’s “wrong.” Screw ‘em! They’re just jealous they ain’t gettin’ laid or rubbed. I’d tell ‘em, “Drainage, drainage, Eli, you boy!”—cuz they’re drained of fun, suckin’ the life outta everything. Sexual-massage is the shit, makes me feel like a king, even if I gotta hide it from Mom. She’d freak, prolly lock me in the basement again. Whatever, I’m a goddamn professional at this livin’ large shit!

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Sometimes, I wander down the less-known paths, like the wiggly alleys off Marktplatz where old pubs serve killer local brews. Got to try them—don’t even ask if you don’t love good beer and a solid story! Found a weird old bench near a secondary statue; probably someone, somewhere left behind a piece of their soul... you feel me? It's as bizarre as a scene where I’d whisper, "R2-D2, where are you?" while tripping over my own feet.

Figure 1. Shape analysis of C24, Ler ecotypes of Arabidopsis and a C24...