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About Cologne

Worst part? Profiles lyin’—“just chillin’,” my ass, you thirsty af! Best part? When it clicks—sparks fly, bed shakes, no bullshit. Surprised me how many weirdos out there, tho—dude asked me to wear a Yoda mask once. Told him, “I find your lack of taste disturbing.”

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The park, oh man, the Stadtpark is rad. I sometimes wander there when I need to clear my head. Little trails wind around, kinda like happy little doodles on the earth. The old oak by the duck pond – some folks say it’s been there since forever – makes me feel all zen and nostalgic. It’s a hidden gem spot if you ask me. I can even recall a time when a squirrel stole my sandwich and I yelled “Oh my gosh!” in a mix of surprise and laughter – pure, simple happiness.

First winners in Europe Trophy Regions crowned last weekend