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About Essen

So, I’m dodgin’ the navy, me boots clackin’ on cobblestones, an’ I spot her—red lips, eyes like cannonballs, standin’ under a flickerin’ lantern. “What we need’s an impulse!” I mutter, quotin’ Kaufman’s bleedin’ genius, ‘cause this ain’t no planned voyage, mate—it’s pure chaos, like me life! I swagger over, tippin’ me hat, an’ she’s all, “Wot’s yer coin, pirate?” Coin? Ha! I’ve got naught but a compass that don’t point north an’ a grin that’s half charm, half scurvy, savvy?

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I love wanderin’ the twisty alleys of our little neighborhood, where ivy climbs the old walls and the scent of fresh pretzels & spiced beer fillin’ the air. It makes me so happy, plus it reminds me of my good ol’ times startin’ the spa. Heck, sometimes I get so emotional, I nearly cry – “Nehmt auf das Chaos das in unser Herzen brennt!” (Yeah, I’m that dramatic sometimes, lol).

Family-Owned Amphibious Car “Outruns” the Police in River Chase