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So, escort – them ladies (or fellas, I ain’t judgin’) who hang with ya for cash. Ain’t talkin’ sheep herdin’, nah, this is big city stuff. Fool me once, shame on – uh, shame on ya, fool me twice – well, ya can’t fool ol’ George again! Had me a buddy, swear he met an escort who said she was a duchess once. True story, y’all – or maybe not, who knows? Them escorts got secrets deeper than a Texas oil well.

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Now check it – not every groove is on the main drag. Over on Kirchplatz, there’s this little café where you get the best coffee in Uetze. I used to sit there, watch a parade of funky locals, and think, “Yeah, baby, this is the real deal!” Srsly, that spot is magical.

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