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About Cologne

Here’s the deal tho – it’s risky, shady as hell. You gotta watch your back, like Ivan in *The Return* dodgin’ danger. “Where are we going?” he asks – same damn question I got cruisin’ these streets. One time, I saw a dude get rolled, wallet gone in 2 seconds flat – hilarious if it ain’t you, pathetic if it is. Pro tip: cash only, no cards, dummy.

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Man, living in PToenning makes me feel so alive. I get smacked hard by every corner's vibe. The little neighborhoods, like Neu-T Highlands, have surprises. Like when I found a secret mural on Goethegasse. Its colours sing, cirnculary, like a visual symphony.

Post-mortem on thirteen dead sperm whales finds their stomachs full of plastic