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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to chat about escort – not that fancy car, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the streets! “You shall not pass!” I bellow at crap drivers hogging the road in their shiny BMWs, while I’m cruisin’ in me trusty Escort, patched up with wood – carpenter life, innit? Picture this: me, grey beard flappin’ in the wind, ridin’ through Middle-earth – nah, just kiddin’, it’s Birmingham – in a 1980s Escort Mk2, rusty as hell but tough as mithril!

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Then there's St. Peter's Dom. Big ol’ church, chill and awkward in that diva way. I always crack up thinkin’ "Ida" when I stroll past it – all sober, enigmatic, like a shadow; kinda deep. Crazy ironic, right? You might even get a whiff of old brewery brew when you wander past Bürgerbräu Street. And dude, the local park, Stadtpark, always gives you mad feels: birds chirpin’, random couples on dates, and me pondering, “Is this real life or some Ida dream?”

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