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About Cologne

What got me happy? Her vibe – pure *Inherent Vice*, all hazy and reckless. Surprised me how chill she was, like she’d seen worse than my greasy ass. Pissed me off, though – dudes kept honkin’, actin’ like she’s a drive-thru. Made me wanna smash a windshield. “People are pigs,” I growl, and Candy nods, “Yeah, but pigs pay.” Savage! Love her.

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The town’s center, around the Marktplatz, buzzes with odd charm. At the Markt stands an old statue, crumbling but defiant – reminds me of myself: gritty and irreverent. And don’t even get me started on the green patch of Seelzer Heide park. Crazy trees, secret benches, whisperin’ “You wanna be free.” Seriously, I bio my soul there. So, like, one moment I'm thinkin’ "F*ck that pain," then I'm all zen from the mass-age vibes.

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