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About Frankfurt

My dear friend, gather round! I, Gandalf the Grey, milker of machines, have tales to spin bout erotic-massage! You shall not pass without hearin this! So, erotic-massage, right? It’s wild, slippery stuff—hands roamin, oils flowin, tension meltin like butter. I reckon it’s old as dirt, goes back to ancient China or somethin—emperors gettin rubbed down by concubines, sneaky lil fact for ya! Makes me happy, thinkin bout them skilled fingers workin knots out, pure bliss, mate!

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The neighborhoods? Man, they’re so diverse! Check out the cobbled lanes in Altstadt, where old brick houses hide quirky cafes that serve killer coffee. There’s this one cafe on Kornspitze—no, wait, on Kornstraße—oh hell, same thing, right?—that always has indie music and artsy type convos. I once sat there overhearing a date that I’d swear was choreographed like a B-movie montage. Felt like, “Let the Right One In,” ya know? Almost supernatural.