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About Berlin

Lemme drop a lil fact—back in 2017, some nerds found Tinder users fuck faster than bar hookups. Like, 2 dates max, then it’s on. Surprised me, ‘cause I thought we’d at least fake romance longer! Nope, sex-dating’s all about the quick hit. Instant gratification nation, y’all. Kinda happy tho—less bullshit, more action. Still, I’m over here yellin, “Why you lyin bout your height, Chad?!”—swear I matched a dude who said 6’2” but showed up 5’9”. Bitch, I’m Lizzo, I see through the facade!

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Now lemme spill some personal beans – in my line of work, I get to see folks in all kinds of moods. Sometimes a relaxed smile after a massage, and sometimes they spill their deepest secrets. I recall this one rainy day, drizzle drippin on cobblestones on Lerchenweg – man, I was like “Seriously, where’s my coffee?!” and it just hit me how unpredictable life can be. And bro, sometimes that city makes me mad too – like when some idiot blocks the entrance to my parlor on Schillerstr – come on, man!

It’s dinosaur day at Gondwana Das Praehistorium