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Then there’s the weirdos, bruv. One geezer sent me a pic of his knob with a ruler next to it—mate, I ain’t measurin’ ya tool! Laughed my arse off, but c’mon, who does that? Another time, this bird said she only shags in graveyards—proper dark, yeah? Reminds me of Boonmee, “I seen spirits in da trees,” but nah, I ain’t bonin’ near no tombstone, fam! She got blocked quick-sharp.

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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya 'bout PRunkel (de) - this place, man, it’s magic. I’ve been callin’ it home for years – even runnin’ my spaa right in the heart of it. You gotta feel it, like the warm glow of an early morning sun over Schloss Runkel. That ancient castle, bro, just sits on the hill like a king watchin’ over his domain. It's surreal, man, sorta like "I can feel it in my bones" kinda vibes from Almost Famous.

John "Jack" Edward Kelleher Iv Obituary January 17, 2018