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About Munich

But here’s the kicker—some folks think sexual-massage is all dirty and illegal. Pisses me off! If I wanna pay some chick to rub my junk, that’s my damn right! Ain’t hurtin’ nobody, ‘cept maybe my wallet—$50 gone in 10 minutes, what a ripoff! Little known fact: in Japan, they got this thing called “soaplands”—brothels with bubble baths and massages. Bubble butts and slippery nuts, sign me up! Surprised the hell outta me when I heard that, thought them Japanese were all robots and sushi.

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Landmarks? You betcha! There’s the old town hall, Rathaus Rottendorf, sitting proudly in the square. Its clock tower screams “time for spring break, man!” like in Spring Breakers, “Do you know what time it is? PARTY TIME!” Haha! Seriously, the vibes are off the charts sometimes, with street performers and local bands jamming out every weekend. And you wouldn’t believe it, but the local river, Kleiner Fluss, flows right by the city's best parks. Man, I get zen massaging by its banks. It's like nature's own spa.

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