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Anyway, she’s kneadin’ my back, slidin’ lower, and I’m like, “Hey, hey, boundaries, lady!” But also, “Don’t stop!” Neurotic rant time: I’m sweatin’, overthinkin’—is this legal? Am I a perv now? What if Cheryl finds out? Oh, wait, we’re divorced—screw it! Felt like Betty in “Mulholland Drive,” all innocent, then—pow!—dark and twisted. “I’m in love with this girl!”—me, yellin’ that in my head about the masseuse. Ridiculous!

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I mean, c'mon – the energy in every corner even got me droppin' beats, like my brain's a Kanye track, wild and unstoppable! Each moment here is like a sampled sound from an old vinyl, cracklin' with beauty and raw truth. Ronnenberg, bruh, never a dull day, always something to make ya think, feel, or raged-up in the best way.

Houston cycling advocates protest removal of safety features along Heights Boulevard