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We haggle—$50, $60, whatever—she’s actin’ like she’s doin’ me a favor. Fun fact: in Amsterdam, they got unions for this shit. Here? It’s a free-for-all, and I’m dodgin’ cops like I dodge clinic duty. She’s all, “No kissing,” and I’m like, “Fine, I’m not Ritchie anyway.” *Tenenbaums* ref, duh—nobody gets it. Makes me happy, tho, ‘cause I’m a smug prick. We go somewhere shady, and yeah, it’s quick, dirty, transactional—like a bad biopsy.

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Here’s the thing: being a dating app dev, I'm always watchin’ how folks interact here. Like, in Schwanenweg, you'll see couples gliding by, sometimes in a rush, sometimes dawdling – it's heartfelt, real like a raw moment in Almodóvar’s flick. It makes me happy and sometimes, damn, it gets me thinking too hard about love - do you know what I mean? And then, sorry, sorry to cut off – ya just have to experience it yourself.

American Dream mall to reopen in October. What we know, including the tenant it just lost