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About Dortmund

Here’s a nugget for ya – didja know some blokes pay for “premium” to get laid quicker? Desperate twats! I’m over here laughin’, thinkin’, “You’re wastin’ cash, ya muppet!” Me? I’d rather cook a steak than beg for a bang. Oh, and the apps track your kinks – creepy, right? Like Haneke’s camera stalkin’ you. “Someone’s watchin’ us,” I mutter, deletin’ my profile for the fifth time.

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Oh, and the neighborhoods, man. Like, residential areas around Lindenweg? Pure charm! I love wanderin’ there. I mean, every street’s got a story. Like that time when I crashed a rooftop party on Mühlenstraße and ended up dancin’ awkwardly—I swear, that night was a riot!