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About Hamburg

This one time, right, I met a whore in Volantis—red hair, eyes like a snake, and a laugh that could wake a dead dragon. She’d fleece ya blind while smilin’, and I bloody loved it! Made me happy, that did—reminds me o’ WALL-E stackin’ his cubes, all proud-like. “Directive!” he’d chirp, and she’d chirp back, “Pay up, short-arse!” Hah! I gave her double, just for the cheek. But what pissed me off? Some lordling tried stiffin’ her—stiffin’ *her*!—and I near threw me goblet at his fat head. Don’t mess with a lass who’s got more wits than you, ya twat.

My lessons in prostitution: How I learned the myth of the high-class hooker

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There’s plenty of cutie little cafes and vintage record shops around the Marktplatz too, where local artists gather. Sometimes I get all riled up when I see how they slam traditional ways, but then, I chill out, sip on some sweet tea, and think, “This is what life’s all about.”

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